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Dr. Kevin Keough interviews Ms. Janette Merrill, host of Birthing Soul Podcasts. Visit her blog.
Introduction To Birthing Soul by Janette MerrillFor the first time in a whole lifetime it seems, I'm beginning understand the call of soul; the call of the depths. Out of the chaos and pain of my 20s I've craved answers, a conscious understanding of my issues and the decisions that turned my life upside down. But even more deeply, I realized I've all along been craving a deep, vibrant inner life. My adolescent faith seemed to offer it, I thought that if you just seek God enough he would take care of all the rest... heal the inner wounds, fill the longings for something real and vibrant inside. So my quest was always outward, upward, toward Spirit. But the passion too easily turned into head knowledge and a meaningless obsession with right belief and right action, and keeping up the right reputation. Even in the moments of mystical ecstasy, the focus was outward and upward, toward the light. The dark symbolized evil, the body and the flesh evil as well - something to be conquered and subdued. And soul? Soul was not understood or even talked about. And yet, soul was calling. Though it took a decisive, tumultuous upheaval of my entire life to finally follow the call down, down into the depths, down through the roots to the core of being. To the underworld. The dark, moist, fertile and sometimes frightening abode of soul. But there in the darkness of loss and depression, of catastrophe and the shearing away of my pride, the loss of my sense of self, the disintegration of life as I had known it... there in the putrefying slime of rotting death, I began to sense something powerful and numinous, something that I could only describe as spiritual. Through dream-work, depth psychology and monumental books, I embarked on a quest for the inner life, a quest for soul. Not that I had called it by those words or was even conscious of what I was searching for. It wasn't so much something that was in my head as in my gut... a drive, a force within me. It was either find meaning to all of this or die. I wrestled with the inner demons of my childhood and early adult pain. I wrestled with understanding painful choices I had made, searching for answers and the answers brought me down to soul. Why did I make the choices I did? Soul starvation. What now? Birth soul. And so that has been the driving passion for the past several years of my life. First merely to survive the dark and painful process of transformation, to dissolve into the blackness of the womb-like cocoon and die there as the being that I once had been. Not seeing life on the other side or the beautiful creature that would eventually be birthed, but trusting somehow that through the heavy darkness something indeed was happening. And then to birth something in that dark place that I could take to the world one day, on vibrant and multi-colored wings. As I get some distance and perspective, understanding is beginning to crystallize. I'm finding the deeper meaning to all the pain, all the darkness. I'm realizing now that spirit and soul are two sides of the spiritual coin, and both are necessary to experience a vibrant, connected life. That just like a tree reaches down into the depths of the earth for strength and nourishment we need to dive into the dark places and develop a deep, rich inner soul life. Yet just as the tree reaches upward toward the sky, soaking in the light and receiving elements of its life from the sun, we also need to reach up toward Spirit, toward the Divine, and let the Light work it's transformational process in us as well. Just as the unmedicated birth of a child is a profound initiatory experience into powerful womanhood, so the dark, painful birth of soul is an initiation into a vibrant and meaningful life. And so it has become my passion and purpose to facilitate the birthing of soul - a sort-of soul midwifery.I invite you to join me on this quest, to not just live a successful outer life, but to become vibrant and bursting with passion that comes from a deep inner fountain. Maybe you've heard the call to soul, or maybe you are in the dark place now, wondering if you will survive, wondering who and what you will be on the other side. Come with me into the depths and find something beautiful. Visit Ms. Janette Merrill's blog. Visit Dr. Kevin Keough's website and blog.
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